for all you 'slaves' out there. this one's for you. enjoy it. (just remember that i am not the one who created it, although maybe i wish i had)

it's all a dream... no... a nightmare. one that will never fade away. i dream of it... it haunts me. i wake up in the middle of the night sweating and panting for breathe. it's shocking. but i have to carry on...

i miss my old life...
so carefree.
i miss the sun...
stupid surgery.
i miss the booze...
yet again dumbass surgery.
i miss my hair...
just had it cut again today.
i miss the freedom...
the cause of everything.

i think i'm suffering from a lack of purpose. i think i have no longer any direction sense or plan anymore. all i can allow myself to focus on is my emmiently intimidating work. i need a plan.

okay! here's a spontaneous checklist:
1. a red crumpler
2. a bottle of vodka
3. a pair of new shoes
4. more berms

5. a girlfriend maybe? haha... wishful thinking.